Jesus + Nothing = Everything

          Justin Taylor was so good to post this article on his blog. I could not pass up the opportunity to share it what you all as well. I have just ordered this book for myself and I am really excited to read it. Tullian is very honest in sharing the things that happened to him and how God molded him. Having been through some transition and change here, this was a huge encouragement to me and a huge challenge. It just confirmed again why I should buy this book and read it. I love to read books that will always point me back to, "The Bible". I believe this is one of those books.

          In this interview with Leadership magazine, Tullian Tchividjian describes some of the ugliness and pain that resulted from attempting to merge his church plant with Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church in 2009:

There were people in the choir who, when I would stand up to preach, would get up and walk out.
People would sit in the front row and just stare me down as I preached. It was extremely uncomfortable.  

People would grab me in the hallway between services and say, “You’re ruining this church, and I’m going to do everything I can to stop you.” 

I would come out to my car and it would be keyed. . . .

They put petitions on car windows during the worship service.

They started an anonymous blog, which was very painful . . . fueling rumors and lies. The blog almost ruined my wife’s life.

Anonymous letters were sent out to the entire congregation with accusations and character assassinations.
It was absolutely terrible.

          He then recounts a family vacation that summer when he poured out his frustration to God. But then things began to change as he read God’s word:

But then I started thinking, why does this bother me so much? Yes, I have people writing nasty things about me, lying about me, spreading rumors about my team. They’re after power. And they’re not getting it, and these are the tactics they’re using. But why does that bother me so much?
I remember saying to God in that moment, “Just give me my old life back.” And he said, “It’s not your old life you want back. It’s your old idols you want back. And I love you too much to give them to you.”

I opened up my Bible. In the reading plan I was following, it so happened that the day’s passages included the first chapter of Colossians. As I read those verses, my eyes were opened. My true situation came into focus. I’d never realized how dependent I’d become on human approval and acceptance until so much of it was taken away in the roiling controversy at Coral Ridge.  

In every church I’d been a part of, I was widely accepted and approved and appreciated. I’d always felt loved in church. Now, for the first time, I found myself in the uncomfortable position of being deeply disliked and distrusted, and by more than a few people. Now I realized just how much I’d been relying on something other than the approval and acceptance and love that were already mine in Jesus. I was realizing in a fresh way the now-power of the gospel—that the gospel doesn’t simply rescue us from the past and rescue us for the future; it also rescues us in the present from being enslaved to things like fear, insecurity, anger, self-reliance, bitterness, entitlement, and insignificance.  

Through my pain, I was being convinced all over again that the power of the gospel is just as necessary and relevant after you become a Christian as it is before. When that biblical reality gripped my heart, I was free like I had never felt before in my life. It gives you the backbone to walk into a room full of church leaders and say “this is what we’re going to do and this is why we’re going to do it, even if it gets me thrown into the street.” There is a fresh I-don’t-care-ness that accompanies belief in the gospel. Whether you like me or not doesn’t matter, because my worth and my dignity and my identity are anchored in God’s approval. Christ won all of the approval and acceptance I need.

Five Warning Signs of Declining Church Health

Found this article by Thom Rainer today, and it really got me to thinking about Church health. I thought I would share this with any who read and would love and invite your comments. Grace Baptist Church is going through some transition. God has called one of our Elders to new ministry in Ontario and we are very excited for him and his family. But as we now look to see what God has in store for us it is a great time to pray and think about our own spiritual health and how God would have us respond.

The truth is, some things in this article convict and challenge me, while others encourage and confirm for me that God is working and we are on the right track. I am more convinced than ever that prayer and quiet time with God is needed to reflect and hear His still small voice.

Yet I am excited and thrilled to know God's love and grace and have a peace that God has amazing things planned for Grace Baptist Church. Praise God from whom all blessings flow and may God get all the glory in His Church both now and forever.

          "December 17, 2004, should have been a day of celebration.
           Nellie Jo and I had been married 27 years on that date. We were in Naples, Florida, enjoying the sunshine and each other.
Then the phone call came.
           We had been given a great deal of confidence that the biopsy would likely prove negative. Proceed with our anniversary celebration, we were told. In the unlikely event that the report was not good, they would let us know.
           The report was not good. Nellie Jo had cancer. The next two years would prove to be some of the most challenging years of our lives and marriage.

When an Unhealthy Body Looks Healthy

           Looking back, it is amazing to recall how healthy Nellie Jo looked. She showed no signs of fatigue or sickness. Had she not seen a couple of warning signs, she might have found out too late about her cancer. She might not be alive today.
           I’ve seen it countless times. My team would go into a church for a consultation, and we would begin interviewing church members. We would hear from many of the congregants that their church was healthy and thriving. Then we would see the warning signs. And we would begin to fear that the apparently healthy body was not really healthy at all.
The church was sick. Some of the churches were really sick.

Five Warning Signs

            What were some of the warning signs my team saw? Though the list is not exhaustive, these five issues were common. Some of the churches had one or two on the list; some had all five.

1. The church has few outwardly focused ministries. Most of the budget dollars in the church are spent on the desires and comforts of church members. The ministry staff spends most of its time taking care of members, with little time to reach out and minister to the community the church is supposed to serve.

2. The dropout rate is increasing. Members are leaving for other churches in the community, or they are leaving the local church completely. A common exit interview theme we heard was a lack of deep biblical teaching and preaching in the church.

3. The church is experiencing conflict over issues of budgets and building. When the focus of church members becomes how the facilities and money can meet their preferences, church health is clearly on the wane.

4. Corporate prayer is minimized. If the church makes prayer a low priority, it makes God a low priority.

5. The pastor has become a chaplain. The church members view the pastor as their personal chaplain, expecting him to be on call for their needs and preferences. When he doesn’t make a visit at the expected time, or when he doesn’t show up for the Bible class fellowship, he receives criticism. In not a few cases, the pastor has lost his job at that church because he was not omnipresent for the church members.

Where Do We Go from Here?

           The bad news is that few churches recover if the patterns above become normative. The church is a church in name only. It is self-gratifying rather than missional. It is more concerned about great comfort than the Great Commission and the Great Commandment.
           The good news is that a few churches have moved from sickness to health. The path was not easy. It first required that the congregants be brutally honest with themselves and God. It does no good to speak glowingly of a church that is unhealthy and getting worse.
            Many of the turnaround churches we consulted then moved to a time of corporate confession and repentance. They confessed to God their lack of obedience and their selfish desire for their own comfort.
            And still other churches made an intentional effort to shift the ministries and the money of the church to a greater outward focus. This step can be particularly painful since a number of church members often protest with vigor that their needs are no longer being met.

To Become a Healthy Church

             Indeed we could focus on the reality that the great majority of sick churches do not recover. But that focus provides little value.
             We should look at the admittedly few churches that have moved from sickness to health. We should learn how they turned from an inward focus to an outward focus. We should follow their examples of moving from selfish desires to radical obedience to God.
In His power the unhealthy church can become healthy.
Heed the warning signs.
It could be the difference between life and death.

A note about myself!

          We are about to have our Bible conference for 2011 start here at Grace Baptist Church. I have just returned from vacation, all of our ministries are about to launch, the summer is still here so many are traveling, we have several construction projects we are trying to finish up and pay for, plus we are trying to get our school ready for the coming year. Finances are tight, attendance is down, giving is down and stress is high!
          I know, I know, do I want some cheese to go with my wine. No; I don't. In fact, I am rejoicing in the Lord right now! I truly feel a sense of peace and am confident that God has some amazing and wonderful things to accomplish in the life of myself and His Church here in Charlottetown. But I would be lying if I said I haven't had some pressure moments or some anxious moments. While in the midst of one of those moments I came across this article by Kevin DeYoung and I wanted to pass it on to you all as well. Please take special note of the bolded sections and as always comments are welcomed.

Pastoral Pressure and Apostolic Anxiety

          2 Corinthians 11:28 always seemed like a strange verse to me–until I became a pastor.
Here’s Paul rattling off all the ways he’s been beat up for Jesus—imprisonments, lashes, rods, stoned, shipwrecked, adrift at sea, sleepless nights, hunger and thirst, cold and exposure, danger from everyone everywhere (v. 23-27)—and then as the cherry on top Paul mentions one more trial: “apart from other things, there is the daily pressure on me of my anxiety for all the churches” (v. 28). This is the mighty Apostle Paul, the one counted it a joy to “spend and be spent” for his people (12:15), the one who was sorrowful yet always rejoicing (6:10). This is the Paul who faced every imaginable opposition and yet learned to be content (Phil. 4:11) and anxious about nothing (4:6). And here he is admitting that even with everything else he’s endured he still feels daily pressure and anxiety for all the churches.
          Ever since becoming a pastor I have found unusual comfort in this verse. It’s not that I have accomplished what Paul accomplished, or suffered what he suffered, but every earnest minister will feel this burden for the church. And Paul had several churches to burden him! The churches were full of infighting and backbiting. They put up with false teaching. They were prone to legalism on one end and complete chaos on the other. Some of the church members were making insignificant matters too important, while others were too willing to compromise on Christian essentials. Paul loved these churches and their struggles burdened him more than shipwreck or imprisonment.
          Before I go any further, let me be clear: I don’t think pastors are the only ones with burdens. We are not the only ones with anxiety. In many ways we have the best job in the whole world. I certainly feel exceedingly thankful to do what I do on most days. I have no interest in comparing the difficulty of pastoral ministry with the difficulties of other vocations. All I want to do is encourage pastors to keep fighting the good fight, and encourage congregations to keep encouraging their pastors.
          I’m not surprised Paul felt daily pressure for the churches. His work never seemed to let up. He had letters to write, visits to make, a collection to gather for the saints in Jerusalem. He had to send people here and there and manage the affairs of his churches from a distance. He had to respond to a myriad of criticisms, often conflicting criticisms. Some people thought he was too harsh. Others said he was too weak. Some people in his churches were ascetics and thought Paul was worldly. Others were licentious and thought Paul was too ethically demanding. They complained about his teaching. They questioned his credentials. They compared him negatively to the original apostles. They thought him lame compared to the false apostles. They didn’t like the way he handled money. They didn’t like his preaching style. They didn’t like the way he arranged his travel plans. They didn’t like his discipline. On some days they just didn’t like Paul. All this for the man who led them to Christ, loved them like a Father, planted (many of) their churches, refused their money, and risked his neck for their spiritual good. No wonder there was no weight for Paul like the weight of caring for God’s people.
          Ask any pastor who really takes his work seriously and he will tell you of the pressures he feels in ministry—people in crisis, people leaving, people coming, people falling through the cracks, people disappointed by the pastor, people disappointing to the pastor. In the midst of this work the pastor is trying to find time for study, prayer, preparation, and family. He’s trying to improve himself, train up new leaders, meet the budget, get to know a few missionaries, champion important program, manage staff, take care of administrative details, provide for deep, accessible worship and preaching, be responsive to new ideas, listen to new concerns, be ready to help when people are in trouble.
          And most pastors feel a burden for all the other things they could
          But be encouraged. God uses weak things to shame the strong (1 Cor. 1:27). His grace is sufficient for you; his power is made perfect in weakness (2 Cor. 12:9). For the sake of Christ, then, be content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when you are weak, then you are strong (v. 10).
Paul had pressure. You have pressure too. But God can handle the pressure. And he looks good when you can’t.

I love the Church!

          We are about to host our Bible conference next week with Josh Harris. Josh has written several books in reference to the Church, one of which is called,  "Why Church Matters" this book explores and explains why the Church is so important, why we should all belong to a local church and why God did it this way. I have to say openly and honestly I love the church!
          I know we don't make church perfect, but God is building His Church and one day it will be perfect. I believe deeply that here in the West we don't take church seriously enough and we have grown complainant and consumeristic about church. Yet, God commands and blesses His children through the church and I ache for so many who are missing out on those blessings.
          Kevin DeYoung has also written extensively on Church and here is a little something he wrote...

Glory of God: Glory to God and Going to Church

Ephesians 3:14-21
…to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus… (v. 21)
          As a pastor I hear the question fairly often: “Why do Christians need to go church?” Sometimes the questioner is a young child wanting to get out of his boredom on Sunday morning. Other times the questioner sincerely wonders why we must be a part of a church if we can have a relationship with God anywhere, anytime. Most often, the questioner is an adult hoping to be “spiritual but not religious.”
          The local church is the hope of the world. Unless we are physically unable, every Christian should be a part of a church. The church is where Christ gets glory (Eph. 3:21) and where we (not just I) shine as lights in the world (Phil. 2:15). The New Testament assumes that believers belong, not just to the church universal, but to a specific community of Christians.
          That’s why Paul wrote nine of his thirteen letters to churches and why each church in Revelation is represented by an individual lampstand. God’s plan has always been to establish a people, not simply a loose assortment of individuals.
          It’s through the preaching of the word, the giving of gifts, the building up of the body, the loving of the unlovely–all in the context of the local church–that Christ gets glory.

The Gift of Friendship and the Godliness of Good Friends (Part 4)

The old saying goes, "better late than never!" well here is part four of Kevin DeYoung's posts on Friendship...enjoy. Steve

Question Three: Are You a Faithful Friend
Yesterday, I gave three characteristics of a foul friend. Today I conclude the four part series with three characteristics of faithful friend.
First, a faithful friend is there in times of trouble. “Do not forsake your friend and your father’s friend, and do not go to your brother’s house in the day of a calamity. Better is a neighbor who is near than a brother who is far away” (Prov. 27:10). Given how important family is in the Old Testament, it is surprising that Proverbs would say don’t go to your brother’s house. The thought seems to be, “Don’t overlook your friends. They will be there for you every bit as much as your family will.” Contacts are good. Networking can be valuable. Having a plethora of acquaintances and well-wishers is nice. Racking up friends on Facebook is fine. But real friendship is proven in adversity (Prov. 17:17).
Fake friends go away when you’re in trouble. Faithful friends get better when times get harder. “A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother” (Prov. 18:24). The next time you are in the midst of suffering and ask God, “What possible reason can there be for this trial?” consider one thing he may be up to is making your friendships sweeter and stronger.
Second, a faithful friend knows how to handle conflict. He doesn’t hold grudges. He doesn’t keep an open file in his brain marked “ways you’ve hurt me.” Keeping a long, detailed record of wrongs is like building friendships with a revolver under your coat. It’s no way to make friends, or keep them. “Be not a witness against your neighbor without cause, and do not deceive with your lips. Do not say, ‘I will do to him as he has done to me; I will pay the man back for what he has done’” (Prov. 24:28-29). Faithful friends never seek revenge. They are eager to overlook faults and quick to forgive. “The soul of the wicked desires evil; his neighbor finds no mercy in his eyes” (Prov. 21:10).
Part of handling conflict well is being slow to speak of your friends’ faults to others. “Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends” (Prov. 17:9). Good friends speak to someone, not around him. It’s amazing how many people we will talk when we have a personal conflict, but we avoid talking to the person with whom we have the conflict. It’s like driving in a round-about and never getting off (“Big Ben…Parliament”). Proverbs is right: “Argue your case with your neighbor himself, and do not reveal another’s secret, lest he who hears you brings shame upon you, and your ill repute have no end” (Prov. 25:9-10).
Third, faithful friends make each other better. “A man of violence entices his neighbor and leads him in a way that is not good” (Prov. 16:29). This is not the way of a good friend. We’ve probably all had those friends that make us feel nobler and purer, and those friends that make you feel a little dirty and out of sorts. Bad company corrupts good character (1 Cor. 15:33). Your strongest relationships should be with those who lead you to Christ, not with those who draw you away. This is especially true when you are young or when you are outnumbered. Your deepest friendships should be gospel friendships.
Faithful friends help each other with their words. “Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel” (Prov. 27:9). The writer mentions two precious things in this proverb, oil and perfume, but neither are as precious as a wise friend. Go to your friends with your toughest predicaments and darkest secrets. Talk to them about sex and money and all the things we keep hidden. Get their advice before buying a house or taking a new job or getting married. The best friends combine their IQ’s and get smarter as a result.
We all know the proverb: “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another” (Prov. 27:17). It’s a great word picture. Ask yourself: am I sponge that never hurts anyone, but never helps much either? Am I a sword that cuts to the quick but also destroys? Or am I a stone, the kind of friend upon which others can be sharpened, made better and more mature? Faithful friends make better stones than sponges or swords.
Jesus Is a Friend
Of course, I’d be remiss if I didn’t end this series by point us to the One to whom all Scripture points. “Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). That means the greatest friend is the one who laid down the most for his friends. No question who this is.
To be sure, Jesus is more than a friend, but not less. He is the Divine Friend better than any other. He is never a fake friend, but always seeks our best. Neither is he a foul friend. He is slow to anger instead of quick to criticize. He is thoughtful and tender instead of annoying. He’s always trustworthy and never lets us down. Best of all, Jesus is a faithful friend. He not only sympathizes and comforts you in trouble, he delivers you from your greatest trouble, which is sin. Not only does he speak the truth and handle conflict, he made peace through his blood when were at enmity with him. And he doesn’t just make us better, he makes us new. What a friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear. What a privilege to carry everything to him in prayer.

The Gift of Friendship and the Godliness of Good Friends (Part 3)

          Here is the third installment of Kevin DeYoung's series on friendship. Again it is another pointed article meant to cause us to be honest and reflective in our approach to this all important part of our lives. Read and apply...Steve

Question 2: Are You a Foul Friend?
Let me suggest three traits.

          First, a foul friend is quick to criticize. In my opinion, there are two kinds of people that have the hardest time making friends. One is the person wants to have friends so badly she can’t understand what it means to be a friend. These people are socially unaware. They don’t ask questions. They see the relationship as a one way street. Everything about them screams “I’m an empty vessel ready for you to pour your love and affirmation and curiosity into me.”
          The other type that has a hard time making friends is the super critical person. These people have an opinion on everything and must verbalize that opinion to everyone (probably bloggers!). More than just offering their opinion, they rain down a relentless barrage of negativity. “Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense, but a man of understanding remains silent” (Prov. 11:12).
          A few weeks ago I was riding in a car with an older Christian man I’d never met before. I was struck by the bridle he put on his tongue. He would ask me a question and when he saw that we might not completely agree, he’d simply say, “I see you’ve thought about that. I don’t need to say anything more.” He asked good questions and kept his thoughts to himself sharing them would have served no constructive purpose. Bad friends share every thought, however critical, as a means of self-expression.
          They don’t think what their words are doing or whether they are necessary in this situation.
Consequently, the foul friend gets into conflict that could have been avoided. “Do not plan evil against your neighbor, who dwells trustingly beside you. Do not contend with a man for no reason, when he has done you no harm” (Prov. 3:29-30). It’s all too easy to ruin friendships because we had a bad day. It’s just as easy to get into a senseless argument because of our own jealousy, insensitivity, or hypersensitivity. Foul friends are quick to criticize.
          Second, a foul friend is annoying. We’re not talking personality or temperament. Some people rub us the wrong way. Fine. But other people are just plain rude. Rude, annoying people aren’t aware of, or don’t care about, social customs and cultural norms. This may seem like an innocent quirk, but the Bible calls it sin (1 Cor. 13:5).
          Proverbs gives two concrete examples of annoyingness in action.
1) Being obnoxious. “Whoever blesses his neighbor with a loud voice, rising early in the morning, will be counted as cursing” (Prov. 27:14). Got it? Don’t be the life of the party when you wake up. (Kids, this applies to you too.)

2) Not knowing your place. “Let your foot be seldom in your neighbor’s house, lest he have his fill of you and hate you” (Prov. 25:17). If you’re the sort of friend who comes over unannounced, never says please or thank you, always expects people to wait on you, and has no recognition of your role as a guest, then you’re not the sort of friend people are looking for.

          Third, a foul friend can’t be trusted. This may mean you’re a blatant liar (Prov. 23:10-11; 25:18). But duplicity can be more subtle. “Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it. Do not say to your neighbor, ‘Go, and come again, tomorrow I will give’–when you have it with you” (Prov. 3:27-28). Foul friends don’t keep their end of the bargain. They don’t return favors. They don’t give back what they borrow. They are slow to help and quick to look for ways to avoid being put upon. You can’t trust them to keep their word.
           Along the same lines, they are careless with their words. “Like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows, and death is the man who deceives his neighbor and says, ‘I am only joking’” (Prov. 26:18-19). Words hurt after you launch them, no matter what you say your intention was. So be careful. If you don’t care about the effect of your words, people won’t trust you. And if you can’t be trusted you won’t be a very good friend.

The Gift of Friendship and the Godliness of Good Friends (Part 2)

Continuing the series by Kevin DeYoung...This post is especially pointed. My Father often told me growing up, "Stephen, you will be blessed of God to have one or two best friends" I never believed him then, but boy; was my Dad right! Now I find myself passing this advice on to the children God has blessed Debbie and I with. The strange thing though, is that I find myself being more aware of another point of view on friendship, namely; am I a real friend? That is the subject Kevin deals with in this post, read, enjoy and be changed... Steve

Question 1: Are You a Fake Friend?
There is one defining characteristic of the phony friend in Proverbs: he uses people. The fake friend makes friends with people who can give him things. He establishes relationships solely for personal gain. In Proverbs this means money.

• “Wealth brings many new friends, but a poor man is deserted by his friend” (19:4).
• “The poor is disliked by his neighbor, but the rich has many friends” (14:20).
• “Many seek the favor of a generous man, and everyone is a friend to a man who gives gifts. All a poor man’s brothers hate him; how much more do his friends go far from him! He pursues them with words, but does not have them” (19:6-7).

It’s hard to tell if Proverbs is making a moral judgment on those who cozy up to the rich. Certainly, part of the point is simply to show the privilege of the rich versus the poor. But I think we are meant to see the recognize the fickleness of these friends. Faithful friends are hard to find (Prov. 20:6). Fake friends come in abundance, and they come for your stuff.
Fake friends use people. Money is the example in Proverbs, but there are other ways to use people. Some people get close to pastors or politicians or athletes because they want access, power, or popularity. Others may be so accustomed to soliciting favors for business or school or church affairs that they can no longer tell when their personal charm is genuine and when it’s an act. None of us are immune to the dangers of friendship fakery. It’s possible to plug a book, or speak at a conference, or rave about a blog, or feign chumminess with a Christian mover-and-shaker and all the while wonder if you are doing this to receive the same treatment.
A few years ago I read a book about Billy Graham and the presidents. What struck me most was how these powerful men welcomed Graham into their lives because he seemed like the only person who didn’t want anything from them. History shows they often wanted something from Graham, but he gave them the gift of friendship without manipulation. He was no fake friend.
If I ever get into the business of writing fortune cookies, this will be one of my first ones: “Beware the friend who passes out back-scratchers. He does not have your best interest at heart.”